7 Things Enneagram type Fours Can Do to Help Themselves Grow

  1. Notice your attention going to what is missing and longed for in your life and learn to value
    what is positive in your life right now.
  2. Maintain a consistent course of action despite fluctuating and intense feelings and delay
    reacting until intense emotions begin to subside. Letting your strong feelings run the show
    only leads to inaction and more suffering.
  3. Discover in yourself the qualities which you envy in others.
  4. Participate in body-based activity and learn to ground yourself.
  5. Remind yourself that when feelings of abandonment, rejection and insignificance come up,
    they are just perpetuated habits of mind from childhood and can be let go of, if you truly want
    to end your own suffering. The truth is that we are loved and completely whole at all times,
    under all circumstances, even painful ones.
  6. Learn to value the ordinary, mundane aspects of life rather than wishing life were more
    dramatic, exciting, intense, romantic and emotionally fulfilling.
  7. Recognize that being self-absorbed, temperamental and feeling special are the addictive
    substitutes for loss and feelings of abandonment. If you focus on genuinely connecting with
    other people (rather than feeling “different”) you will feel more accepted and less