Fe is connecting with others. The process of Fe often involves a desire to connect with (or disconnect from) others and is often evidenced by expressions of warmth (or displeasure) and self-disclosure. They carry conversations well, finding common ground with their speaker. They tend to find the correct and gracious way to respond in any given situation, no matter how tense or uncomfortable it is. Fe types typically radiate goodwill and enthusiasm. They are optimistic about life in general and human potential in particular. They prefer to focus on the positive, harmonious and uplifting aspects of people and human relations, paying little attention to negative, pessimistic, limiting, and divisive messages, situations and conclusions. Their primary goal is to create and maintain good feeling and harmony among people.
Fe is considering others and the group – organizing to meet their needs and honour their values and feelings. Adjusting to and accommodating others, and deciding if something is appropriate or acceptable to others. The “social graces,“ such as being polite, being nice, being friendly, being considerate, and being appropriate, often revolve around the process of Fe. Laughing at jokes when others laugh, and trying to get people to act kindly to each other also involves Fe. Using this function, one responds according to expressed or even unexpressed wants and needs of others. Fe types are careful not to hurt others’ feelings and try to take others’ well-being into account. If they cannot avoid telling someone an Unpleasant truth, they will carefully soften the message by putting it in an affirmative context. For Fe types, unconditional positive regard is a strongly held value. They are always focused on the other person, feeling a glow when those around them are happy, and troubled when something is amiss.
Fe is maintaining societal, organizational, or group values. “Family”, “friend”, and “co-worker” aren’t states of emotion. They’re categories of human alliance, organized by degree of relatedness. What we are doing, when we use these categories, is accommodating our specific experience of people to the conceptual shapes the terms offer. This is a rational process, not a sentimental one. These standards constitute one aspect of our societal value system. They set up conventions that tell us how relationships are “supposed” to be conducted and what responsibilities they entail.
Fe is conceptual and analytic. It encourages us to make rational choices, to measure our options for relationship against external standards of behaviors. [Customs] Fe prompts in this regard are not a matter of emotion, impulse, or doing what we learned in kindergarten. These are secular rituals—visible signs that mark a participant’s membership in the community at large. Such rituals can touch us, but they aren’t occasions of sentiment. They’re a vocabulary, part of our feeling lexicon. They submit to collective form an experience ordinarily confined to individual history, allowing us to express the kinds of relationships important to us as people. Social values mark these wares of decision making that go beyond one person’s immediate experience to affect the community as a whole. Apart from questions of moral rectitude, our behaviors toward others have implications, whether we intend them or not. Fe types seek continuity through harmonious relationships and collective values. They excel at picking up on the tone of a situation and acting accordingly, adding warmth to a cool setting or turning sour into sweet.
They will naturally seek to know what people do well, what they enjoy, where and how they work, and understand what they need in order to make the appropriate connections with other people. They weave and strengthen the collective fabric of social conventions and interactions. Fe types seem to have an infinite of acquaintances from all walks of life and are always on the lookout for people in need and those who can help out. Inclusiveness is important and they are particularly sensitive to those who are excluded. As team players and project leaders, they have a gift for rallying their players, focusing on what is being done right and each member’s strengths. They are loyal and they expect loyalty. They are natural cheerleaders, often expressing support, gratitude, and encouragement, and heaping praise onto those they appreciate. They take note of what is being done and what needs doing, offering their help and assistance wherever necessary.
Fe and Ti have a suppressive relationship. Fe devotes itself to the feelings of the collective, and must ignore one’s personal logic in order to satisfy the customs of the tribe.