Heart and Defensive Points/Arrows for Enneagram Type Eight

Type Eight with a Healthy Connection to Type Two: When Eights integrate the positive
aspects of type Two they open up their often-protected big hearts and allow themselves to be
touched deeply by people and their needs. Usually mistrustful of people’s intentions, Eights with
a healthy connection to type Two are able to let down their tough, impenetrable guard and show
how much sincere compassion and concern they have for others. Letting down their considerable
defenses does not come easily for Eights as the sensitive child within reactively feels the need to
protect itself for survival, as it did in childhood. As they allow their hearts to open and their
vulnerability to surface, Eights may momentarily feel a sense of fear and panic. But if they
acknowledge the fear and do not contract against it or close themselves off from their tender
feelings they will gradually become present to their softer, gentler and infinitely more loving
feelings. Integrating Eights can be deeply empathetic and caring, like healthy Twos. Since Eights
tend to be an all-or-nothing type they can be tremendously generous and attentive to those with
whom they feel a special bond. Eights especially like protecting the innocent and the weaker or
disadvantaged members of society. They often have a special attraction to the purity of kids and
pets since they long to reconnect with the innocent child within them. Integrating Eights are able
to nurture themselves, acknowledge their vulnerabilities (including fear of rejection) and admit
their need for mutually fulfilling interdependent relationships. Concerned about the welfare of
others, integrating Eights can make outstanding, empathetic, empowering leaders.
Type Eight with a Healthy Connection to Type Five: When Eights integrate the positive
aspects of type Five they are able to think things through carefully rather than acting on impulse
or overreacting. They are able to detach themselves from a given situation and observe it from a
more objective point of view, like healthy Fives. They can consider the consequences of their
actions and weigh the pros and cons of their decisions. They can be more analytical, systematic
and open-minded in their thinking. They are willing to question everything and dismiss nothing in
an effort to get to their own understanding of fundamental truths. They are also able to respect
other people’s truths which differ from theirs without judgment. This connection can sometimes
make Eights more philosophical, abstract or introspective in their thinking. With a Seven wing
they may even be quite intellectual. They can enjoy empowering people with their insightful
advice. This connection allows integrating Eights to become more moderate in their behavior
rather than excessive.

Type Eight with an Unhealthy Connection to Type Two: When Eights deteriorate to the
negative aspects of type Two they have a great fear of rejection and can form codependent
relationships, or remain single because they just expect people not to like them. This unhealthy
connection to type Two can cause Eights to overreact because they take things too personally and
their pride gets bruised easily. They have a propensity for stormy relationships and can even be
vengeful because they have a difficult time letting go of slights and forgiving injustices against
them. Eights can be possessive and controlling of their partner and possibly even obsessed with
him/her too. They (especially sexual subtype Eights) can also be jealous of would-be rivals.
Eights can be totally out of touch with their own authentic needs, do too much and not take care
of their health, just like unhealthy Twos (Eights can be excessive in their lifestyle – overeating,
staying out too late, drinking, overworking, etc. – which doesn’t support the needs of their body).
Eights can be intrusive and have a difficult time respecting other people’s boundaries. They can
think that they know what is best for others and give unsolicited advice.
Type Eight with an Unhealthy Connection to Type Five: When Eights deteriorate to the
negative aspects of type Five they withdraw from the world for a while, isolate themselves and
take less action. They can become unusually quiet, antisocial and detached, hoarding their
privacy and personal space. They get even more out of touch with their feelings. They can
become more mentally high-strung and may become arrogant know-it-alls. Sometimes they
develop insomnia because of their revved up mind. Eights with an unhealthy connection to type
Five can take especially bad care of their health. They may have some dark moods and
disturbing dreams.

At worst, they can experience intense feelings of guilt if their isolation has come about because of
a fearful recognition of their own unjust, immoral or tyrannical actions that caused others,
including loved ones, to turn against them (or leave them). In that case they are prone to severe
depressions and paranoia about betrayal by others. They can have intense feelings of alienation
and rejection. They can especially feel like isolated outsiders, misfits and loners. They can turn
their aggression against themselves and become self-punishing, possibly even suicidal.

 

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